This blog post was written by May Mak, our Senior Trusts & Foundations Officer.
Book covers from Amanda Khozi Mukwashi and Afua Hirsch.
I am British-born Chinese: a BBC. I look Chinese, but speak with an English accent and it throws people. Curiosity about my origins has always been something I’ve had to deal with throughout my life. I know what people want me to say when they ask me, ‘where are you from?’, but I have never seen the importance of someone knowing that - least of all strangers on a bus or on the street - but not wanting to be rude, I’d always respond with the truth: ‘I’m from the UK.’ I immediately know that I’ve not answered the question with a response the interrogator wants to hear. Unsatisfied by my answer not fitting their criteria of acceptability, the dreaded question then follows: the question that suggests (usually unintentionally) that I do not belong; the question that really makes no difference to the context in which the conversation is being held; the question that is deeply personal:
“But where are you really from?”
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not ashamed of being Chinese, nor do I mind sharing where my parents/grandparents were born (because let’s face it, that’s what is really being asked here). I love finding out about people and their heritage. I am just as curious and interested about cultures and countries as most people are. However, what may appear to be a harmless question, underlyingly, even if unintentional, carries with it suspicion, prejudices and discrimination. My reading in recent years has confirmed to me that I am not alone in my thinking and experiences, and that these feelings I have towards this question matters. Books such as ‘Brit(ish)’ by Afua Hirsh and the aptly titled, ‘But where are you really from?’ by Amanda Khozi Mukwashi speaks into this questioning of identity and the ‘othering’ that takes place when that question is uttered. Some of their experiences of being black and living in Britain heartachingly echoed mine of being Chinese and British-born, while others made me realise the prejudices and privileges that exist around different ethnic minority groups.
Diversity, inclusion and shifting power are key topics that Five Talents is continuing to understand and work towards. In spite of and because of my experiences, I am excited to see and be part of the change towards this work. I am unlearning and relearning what it means to be ‘anti-racist’, recognising my own privileges and understanding how to use this to walk with others who haven’t had the same opportunities and whose voices should be equally valued. I’d highly recommend both books mentioned above: Mukwashi’s book is a shorter read, but both are equally beautifully written, insightful and will take you on a rollercoaster of emotions. Perhaps one day, I will write my own memoire and title it: I am really from London.